Then Gaia Was Like...SNOW!
So I was lost trying to step up the project, I was doubting the concept and didn't know how to salvage it. Then it snowed, a lot, it snowed everywhere and it stuck. Using film was out of the question because it was unnecessary travel while I could use digital, I didn't have much time until the project was due at this rate and so I went out and shot a few times and below is a selection of what I submitted for the final project. Although I sort of like some of the images they mean literally nothing because I was met with too many roadblocks, I got too much in my head about how I wasn't good enough to do what I wanted, I couldn't communicate what I needed. I "failed" and I felt like a sucked as a photographer/artist.
If you're like me, hold your work (anything you do) to a high standard and never think you've done quite good enough. You can only try hard and if you can't succeed at what you were trying to achieve, chances are that's only you seeing that crappy result. Other people around you, your clients, your friends and family. They probably saw the amount of effort you were putting in and see the final product as perfectly acceptable even amazing. For producing photographic work for clients this is a good quality to have. It means you're always striving to be better. Something a person will gladly pay for. Just don't burn out and if you can make the silly mistakes early on your own dime then I would do it.
Throughout my time in college that's what that was for. Once I left I got more productive, technically better and yet I still constantly strive to be better, I also beat myself up when I don't get the shot that I missed but things happen and if you've got a good eye there will be plenty of more opportunities where that came from.
So what I've learned is to overcome that severe self-doubt. Take a breath and go step by step. Just keep moving and the final result will knock people out of the park, it just won't knock you out all the time. I guess this post has been for the triers in life, as a kid I was always labeled as a trier and that got me to the skill level I'm at now in my photography and I continue to grow everyday.